Showing posts with label somethings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label somethings. Show all posts

20 How to wield Success at the GATE

[Image Courtesy: http://www.istockphoto.com]

This post was written by me successfully during the GATE exam 2009.
Three hours of peace from the noisy life of Bangalore, just for a cost of Rs.1000/-.Apply now!!!
Waking up early on a Sunday morning is a bad sign. Waking up on a Sunday morning after a party with friends the previous night to write an exam -- the worst sign. The alarm played the perfect part of the dream destroyer that morning as well. After one hour of relentless ringing I had to give up to the irritating power of Evanescence's wake me up inside ...

I had got ready to leave home but I had one more task to complete before I could be there for the exam. I had to find the way to the exam center. I was able to reach the holy place, a well 1 hour 15 minutes before time, with lot of help from blore's own Auto bhaiyyas. I thought i would be the one to reach there first. But i was greeted by the faces of those guys who were going to have more beautiful wives and cars than me; the guys with the thick glasses and the greasy hair- the geeks. It was like walking into the sets of Attack of the Nerds. Amidst the ruckus created by the geeks and other semi interested students and engineers, I made my way to the small shop on the other side for my breakfast. Finally after a long time of a guy came and commanded the throng of people to go in and be seated inside.

It was a truly nostalgic feeling. Like a blast from the past. Memories of ye old University exams.. Haha.. Many of them were prepared or at least looked like they were. I knew that the only things I was going to answer were the questions on the right side. These questions were like, name, roll number and a number of such tough questions. But they didn't mention anywhere about how much marks each of those questions carried.

Anyway i went about answering all those questions when I saw a guy come in with a big bottle of water. Oh!! man.. prepared like anything. I should have brought pop corn. But I wasn't sure whether eatables were allowed in the exam hall. :( The technical questions were pretty easy. I could answer at least 7 of them correctly. which is a big achievement ( applause). I answered a total of 48/60. I didn't want to get the negative marks of the next 12 questions as well ,so, I stopped guessing the answers. The questions were generally categorized into two : those that I knew and those i didn't. But the latter category contained more questions and I am planning to write to the Chairman about the quantity of questions in Category 2.

In the meantime the guy who had come with the water had almost finished his bottle and from his face I could notice that he seriously needed to take a leak. Poor Guy..
I finished the exam in record time. But the Hall ticket said I could not leave before the completion time. So I cross-checked my brilliant answers and waited for one and a half hours before I asked the invigilator(a typical college lecturer) whether i could gracefully take my leave. I think he was invigilating an exam for the first time and the pride could be seen on his face. With the same gracefulness he told me that I would have to wait till the completion of 3 hours. And to think I never even sat through the whole time of any university exam.. OMG!! I was trapped in some other strange time space continuum.

This was the time, in the course of the whole exam, that I had a major dilemma. What will I do for one more hour? I didn't waste time to find the perfect solution. I found the desk a very good place to get the rest of the Sunday morning sleep. And sleep I did for half an hour. A delightful slumber. I woke up fast in fear, lest I should talk in my sleep and give away those brilliant answers that I had given.

Then I saw the desk. Aha! Nothing more interesting than to read the comments on the, long deprived of paint ,desk. And that too the back bench. :D
The guy who sat at my place was a rap fan (snoop dog and shaggy were the decorators of that place). At one time he had been a Shakira fan but he had developed a certain disliking for her. He name was scratched upon with dividers and correction ink so many times, that I had hard time reading that.
'Does love hurt ?' [some body was planning on loving someone]
The aswers were " Love hurts!!!' [he shouldn't have been so outright]
"I dunno. Please find out" [ i liked this one :)]
Then a series of four letter words.
Another guy had professed his love on the wood :
Mental Chandan*** loves Sharmila... *** [confessions of a self proclaimed crack or the work of his best friends . :)]
The other things were lots of Swastika symbols and random questions and answers.

Soon losing interest in them, I waited for the final fifteen minutes to go by. It was pure torture. I never thought 15 minutes would be so long. And finally the hammer struck the gong and I was free again. I walked out of the college gate passing the excited and nervous faces of the geeks and other unimportant people. That was the only gate i think i could have passed with so much of preparation.

Atlast an end to the trauma of whether I should go for higher studies or not. Then there is always next year... ;)

*** Original names cannot be given out due to security risks to the author. And Chandan; Yes, I took revenge on you for taking my name in vain.
Dad : If you are reading this; This is not my story but of some guy who went to a Gate exam without studying. How can he do that?

Status : Checking my GATE answers... who knows.. may be I got all 48 right. ;) and will be on my way to an IIT before you know it.



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14 The 30 Questions (Tag)


[Photo Coutesy : jamuraa]

I
got this tag this Maverrick who got it from Sailor who got it from Sneha.
[I hope the tag is not an Evil plan by some Evil Warlord to get information about me so that he can overpower me and take over the world].
Here goes..
1)What is your occupation?
I am a central goverment employee*.
*Conditions Apply
( Psst. I heard there is no value in the marriage market for Software engineers. We are a depreciating asset now.)

2)What colour are your socks now?
Never ask a bachelor about his socks >:-

3)What are you listening to now?
I'm hearing Bhumika's voice on the phone persuading me to go to innovative film city this weekend.

4)What was the last thing you ate?
Lemme see:
Wheat flour, (UN)cooked on a flat or slightly concave iron griddle and
Dark yellow colour potato, tomato and onion paste sprinkled with garlic seasoning..
For those illiterate guys, lets say : Roti and aloo curry from the cafeteria.

5)Can you drive a stick shift?
Sorry,I do not know golf. ;)
[searches on Wiki what a stick shift is..]
hmph!!! a vehicle with manual transmission.
Why cant the question be :
Can you drive a vehicle where you have to change the gear manually?
[You don't know to how much extent my wild imagination went to derive the meaning of a STICK SHIFT]
Answer : I can drive and I am a pretty cool driver, but expensive. Last time I drove it cost me around 10,000 bucks.
The back of a stick shift bus came and hit the front of my stick shift car. Not my mistake. Why was the back of the bus parked there?
Indians should be more aware and careful while driving stick shifts . I mean who gave these bus drivers liscence to drive a stick shift.

6)Last person you spoke to on phone?
Salma..
You know.. Salma Hayek..
See I knew you wouldn't believe.
I have an alternate answer ready for those who didn't believe that : the Airtel Broadband Service Guy!

7)Do you like the person who sent you this?
I know Chandan sent this so that he could make me say I like him.
Not the type you think I am, man. aaargh...

8)How old are you today?
Old enough (and 6 years extra) to legally do the FOUR LETTER WORD.. V.O.T.E.

9)What is your favourite sport to watch on TV?
Womens Lawn Tennis. ;)

10)What are your favourite drinks?
Tender Coconut Water :)

11)Have you ever dyed your hair ?
How old do you think I am, 60?

12)Favourite food?
Choru ( kerala rice ) with theeyal (super taty curry from kerala) and fish fry , fish curry and a little chicken and a little bit of prawns and a bit of squids and..

13)Last movie watched?
Why did u have to put such a question in when I am trying to forget the last movie
I watched? BTW its Revolutionary Road.. ( strong sense of sleepiness takes over!!!)

14)Favourite day of the year?
Salary Day.. :)

15)How do you vent out your anger?
I once told my dad I wanted a missile launcher for my birthday. I wanted to try it on the School's official Bully. My dad being a spoil sport didn't get me one.
So my only source of comfort has been my innocent pillow which gets beaten up when I really feel like beating the shit out of someone.

16)Favourite toy as a child?
The neighbour's dog. [ Evil grin on face now ]

17)Favourite season?
The Monsoon. Being a Keralite you will never love any other season.
Esp. when there is a road block and we didnt need to go to school. :)
But there is something special in the air during monsoon in Kerala.
[and its not smell of the sewage overflowing... grr]

18)Do you want your friends to email you?
Yes. Esp. those which say - if you dont forward you will be cursed with constipation for 7 years,7 months and 7 days. In my humble opinion the recession has been caused by people who haven't forwarded such mails and have got the curse of the Email-Server-Gods over our Software Fraternity.

19)When was the last time you cried?
When Diana ,my doggy, the love of my life, died :'(

20)What is on the floor of your closet?
My old underwears, from the time I was in eigth grade, till now.
aaah.. Memories...

21)Who is the friend you have had the longest?
Abhijit : around 13 years now and he still hasn't killed me.
A great achievement, Abhijit.
The Association of Men with Friends who are Unbearable(AMEN. F.U.) bestows the life time achievement award upon you.

22)What did you do last night?
Lemme see now...
Surya,Shanthi,Anushka, bed....
ok...I got it.. I got it..
I went home and tested our new cable connection. Watched Surya Tv (one of the most viewed
malayalam channels). Then I went to Shanthi Sagar for dinner. Then I came back and
saw Anushka's dance class on MTV. Then I went to bed.

23)What are you most afraid of?
Me ? Afraid?
You got to be kidding?
Well...Except if you are not kidding about them slimy,long, reptiles called snakes.

24)Plain,cheese or spicy hamburger?
Cheese.

25)Favourite dog breed?
Dachshund
(Brut,Buddy... I miss you.. Snifff...Sniff.. Chettan (bro) will come back home in a couple of months..)

26)Favorite day of the week?
Yesterday. I always wait for it to come fast.

27)How many states have you lived in?
Two K's:
Kerala and Karnataka.
[But east or west Kerala is the best]

28)Diamond or pearl?
Niether. I am broke, more broke than a church mouse.

29)What is your wish for this new year?
I hope I will be able to go Onsite and clear all my credit card bills.
Amen.

30)New year resolutions?
- Go to office early
- Continue writing Diary
- Read all the books I have bought before buying another one.
- Never follow my Dad's advice on what kind of haircut I should get.
- Call Mom every other day.

I think I am supposed to tag some one else. I tag Clueless and Tony. So Clueless and Tony, if you happen to read this post then there is a tag waiting for you. Any one else who reads this post can also take up the tag.
I am looking forward to reading your 30 Q&As :)

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0 Happy New Year!!


Happy New Year to all of you guys out there. I know its way too "early" to wish you a happy new year but i was a bit indisposed to write blog posts. I hope all of you are holding on tight to your resolutions. As for my resolutions I am thinking of Bidding them a final Good bye. But I have followed them till today. Its pretty hard having a list of resolutions. A list whose beginning you forget by the time you reach the end.

As for blogging in the new year. I hope to continue blogging. And as recession sets in i think may be I have a chance to be a full time blogger. :)

All the best to you. May God Bless you.

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6 Of words, words and still words?!! - Crazy Phobias

Phew!!! with to the core GRE and GMAT prep going on in the house its pretty difficult not to catch a word or two. For some days it was medical terms and shit they are hard to study and more hard to listen. My ear tried escaping those words but with the complexity of them and the pronunciation.. you have to hear them, man . Here is some word diet for you to chew on. After seeing that there are a good lot of words i don't know, i thought i will start with fear...phobias..These words really scare the shit out of me... There are some crazy phobias that you won't believe exists (Well at least I didn't!!).


Scolionophobia - The fear of school .I had it... I admit... If i had known about this then, it would have been a perfect excuse to skip school. How come they don't teach all these things at school??
666 Did u freak out now??? Then you have got the Fear Of 666. And they actually have a word for it : Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia . :)The number 666 or the Satan's Number really freaks out people. I wonder how they did at Maths. If they were asked 222*3 for an exam would they really scream their brains out???!!!
Vestiphobia : This is one kewl phobia . I know the kind of people having this-the bollywood hot chiks... oh!! and it means Fear of clothing.Nowadays you can't play a Hindi song on TV for Fear of Family.It also means poor husbands don't need to take their Vestiphobic wifes out for shopping.. :) Hoping for a Vestiphobic world!!! ;)
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia : Hahaa!!! It is not the fear of Hippopatamus... guess what !!! its the Fear of long words. And they couldn't make a longer word to define that.What in the hell? Anyone looking up on the name of their long word fear would shit in their pants reading this. How would anyone having fear of words speak at all?? They might act dumb and use those sign languages and plug their ears lest some words start drinking their blood.. Oooh!! Vampire Words...
Thats it from me on Phobias!! I will find better ,crazier words and post them for the ignorant lot like me.
Aaahhh...My boss is coming ... Bye bye for now...
I sure have "gettingsickonseeingtheboss"ophobia...
Location : Office, Bangalore
Time :Lunch time.. :)
--Rahul S. Nair
Data Collected from : http://phobialist.com/
Disclaimer : Image is obtained from the web and I don't claim any ownership for it.

0 Lifesaver Template.. Ummaaah

At last i got a pretty neat template..
I like it, but the amount of customization i could do compared to my previous template generated by Psycho-free template generator is limited. I have to get used to the widget interface now. I had been doing tweaking on the html classic template. That was a lot easier.
I got this tempate from eblog templates a pretty neat site. The temporary template (Hemmingway) had a wierd look. I couldn't get used to it anyway after being used to 3 column templates.
Lemme see what all tweaks i can do.
Its fun playing with the template especially if you have lots of work to do at office. Try it on some burnt out day.. It helps really.. :)

02/06/08
15:54

2 Oops! i did it again...

What did i do? i deleted my blog template that i had cared for and
nurtured for over 6 months now. sob! the tears of a father.
from my
mob. locn: madiwala
on the way home...

--
Cheers,
Rahul S. Nair

rahulsreekumar@gmail.com| mail2_rsn@yahoo.com
|[M]+91-9886792304 |http://www.blogthemdown.blogspot.com

7 Very Important Notice!!!


My birthday is coming up and I am publishing a wish list...
You can buy me or do what ever you like in the list.. its left to you
My wish list :
  1. pay off my credit card bill
  2. M40-A3 sniper rifle
  3. Be a target for practice
  4. Pick me as a blind date(make sure its blind otherwise you will regret it the rest of your life. If its blind you don't know whom you are dating till the end. Brilliant right!!) and give me a SURPRISE!!! * Conditions Apply
  5. Make me pay for all the pain I have caused you by sending me to Switzerland and freezing me to death. Come on I have done so much to you and I am giving you a brilliant idea.
  6. Visit my blog everyday, even though it sucks big time!!!
* Offer valid only for girls.

Those who can't do any of these can attend the Bday Party I am throwing. You can come there with the mentality of an imbecile and eat what ever I buy you with out having the slightest feeling about what a disgusting friend ditcher (Dosth, dosth naaa rahaaaa...) you have been. Don't you worry when you see my big round eyes , about to cry or when you see me looking at your empty hands and smiling with a tinge of sadness on my face when you come to MY PARTY!!!!

Common man, just kidding but you can be there for the target practice at least can't you, friennnnd..... pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease

7 Living With Them

It' tough!! Ok.. coming to what's tough...I cooked up this whole blog because i was bored in office today. Yeah! I did . Cool right. Iknow.
Them in the title basically refers to three beautiful blond super sexy chicks who I live with.
OH!!Yeaaaaaah!!
See, now you are imagining. Now as the brain exercise is over, "them" actually means my room mates who are everything but _______ blond super _____ chicks. [Those parts have actually been censored for my existence on earth.]

Them 1 is a guy a named Jobin or Jobsy[yeah like Chopsuey.chopsuey jobsy,jobsy chopseuy..
ahem!!]

Fact File
----------
Name : Jobin Thomas
Interests: watching movies( that too romantic english movies...) and browsing
Habit : Nocturnal(sleep : 5-9 am). Nocturnal doesn't sound right. sort of like a cross between software developers : one who did morning shift and one who did night shift.
Habitat: Computer Room

NO!!NO!! NO!! you got it wrong. He is not the guy with thick glasses staring at the computer and drooling with mouth wide open. He is the guy with out the glasses and the drool(well sometimes...). But he finds time to do all his stuff before all this. May be he has got this awesome time machine thing that he is not sharing it with me (that bloody sun of a gun).If he doesn't share neither am I going to share the chocolate I got today.

Them 2 is Govind [ As the name suggests you may be thinking of a guy with innocent eyes , a
dash of ash on his forehead. Let me advice you STOP!! you are thinking too much than you age allows you to.The only way he could be named Govind is that his Mom saw him for the first time and he was having a beer bottle in his hand. She must have screamed out loud ... GOVINDAAA... I would have if I had a kid like that,even you would have, admit it. Coming to think of that, I have to think of a better name to scream in such a situation.. How about BRAD PPITTTT.. or JAMESS BONDDDD... Lot of time to think over that. Now coming back to the subject. The baby got his name finally. He is a Software Engineer who is always under work pressure (welcome to the club, have a seat on the toilet , the club is really cramped). He has a Car. He has a pair of socks.

Them 3 is Jason.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jason
Jason (Greek: Ιάσων, Etruscan: Easun) was a Greek mythological figure. His father was Aeson, the rightful king of Iolcus, and his mother was Amphinome.
That was just for general knowledge. He is not the son of Aeson and Amphinome... If he was He would have a tough time telling his Mom's name .. every time it would sound as I'm Phi Know Me?? People would think , Phi, cool name. May be his brother is Phu. He is a playboy. He really plays basketball well and he is like a boy. He has this cool bike which he rides like the ghost rider. You know what I mean... Ghost... Oh God!!I'm so funny.

Then finally the hero arrives.... The fighter of all evil...Spreading light through the darkness ..
(Claps.....)
I don't like to flatter myself . Being a software engineer the first thing you are taught is to tell whatever you have done in a blown up way. Suppose you have done nothing you can adjust with the big words like optimization,analyzing tree structures.. Amma!! I don't even realize what i am saying...
It would be unfair that I leave out myself considering the praises i have showered upon my room mates. See, as you would have already guessed I am obsessed with writing crazy stuff... But, hold on, that doesn't mean in anyway that I am crazy. If you use better words like psychopathic maniac or stuff like that I will have to agree Because I don't understand those big words, I would rather think you are praising me. I am a perfectionist i.e; to mean that if there was a speck of dust on my table, it would better be there the next time I look... otherwise I don't care who the bloody hell has moved it.. I want it back there!!!
I have a Mush and that too a good one... its so good it helps me keep that my part of my face covered up ... I am thinking of now better ideas like a beard , a pair of glasses... In the end I can imagine myself becoming the most handsome hunk around here... BOOKINGS OPEN NOW!!!!

And here's one thing that very less people know... My mom and dad actually named me Pankaj first.. But luck was with me, I don't know why. (No offences to the name Pankaj but it is really easy to make funny names with it like panku, pankunni ...)May be I pissed on people who called me that name...( Beware!! Danger Baby here... Oh!! Boy , i was damn smart back then), My dad decide to change it to Rahul.Now it seems Pankaj is a cool name after all. In a crowd of 6 , there are atleast 5 Rahul's other than me... Thanx to Bollywood...

To my room mates : If you think I have been unfair to you... I would say... This is my own bloody blog... You go and write whatever you want in yours... Yeah, bring it on...

Guys you know its like living with half headed guys , when I am with you. Your half head and my half head makes it One HELL of a head....




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