17 Wish Upon A Falling Star

[This lovely piece of art is by Julianne . See it on Flickr]

I wish i could see her every night,

Every day in every sight.
So stare, and stare would I,
Eyes fixed on a cloudless sky.

I wish that she would dance,

She would fly in a graceful stance.

A silky gown she would wear,

And give the sky a shiny scar to bear.

I wish i could hold her hands,

Hold her close and hold her tight,

Embrace her into a lovely waltz,

Which would even the heavens exalt.

I wish I could survive,

Could dream and could stay alive,

In hope of the day I would unite

With my ever eluding woman of light.

*****

[

I am sure most of you haven't any clue as to what i am rhyming about.

The story goes like this. I have never seen a falling star in my life (so uncool, i KNOW!!). This attempt at a poem is for the lady of my life whoever she might be and wherever she might be, because I haven't seen her either. So I thought it might be appropriate to compare her with a falling star, neither of whom have met in my life. And I wish upon a falling star (some star ought to be falling at some place!! :) ) that I the day I see a falling star, its a sign that I meet my lady as well. So, please do pray that I do see a falling star. I am in no hurry, so you can take your time to include it in the list of things that you will be asking God.

]

[see this awesome pic by Sandeep.]

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1 Finally Revealing : My Secret Identity

Dark Forces and Evil Creatures..
BEWARE
(that "beware" goes to the moral police as well)

Here he comes to scratch your back..
Your Friendly Neighborhood
Mysterious Splintery Splinter..

[Enjoyed a lot making myself a hero. Try for yourself @ The Hero Factory ]

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22 All I Wanted To Know !

[Photo By : Midiman]

Being an inquisitive 9 year old, I was always confused about the concept of heaven and hell. If both existed why couldn't we see it? How will I know in advance where I will go? And can we come back to earth if we want to sometimes, like Mahabali does once in a year Or is that only for privileged persons and VVIPs? I knew a person who had the answer for it all, Ammoomma. She knew everything. She knew how Vamanan had killed Mahabali. So logically she ought to know how it was at hell and heaven. So I decided to ask the knowledgeable one.

Ammomma was sitting on the portico singing her bhajans as she always does in the evening. There was a light breeze outside. The hibiscus leaves rustled. Its flowers had just been sacrificed in the puja room.The light jasmine fragrance of burning incense floated in the air. I went and laid my head on Ammoomma's lap.

'Ammomme... Ammmomme... Ee swargavum narakvum evideya?' (where is heaven and hell?) 'Where will I go when I die?' 

'So Appumon, wants to hear about heaven and hell. Let me tell you a story',

And she started telling a fable about the man who lived without hurting a living thing in his life. But he was not admitted in heaven because of his arrogance and bad boy attitude. She told me that the heavens where in the sky very far away from what our eyes could see and that hell was deep underground.

'Wow!! like I didn't know that before', I thought. Just wasted my time asking her. I should find out myself.

Finally after hours of thinking. I came upon a great plan. I will die and then I will know where I will go. Then I will enter into a pact with the Gatekeeper and get a parole to earth every now and then. So firmly focusing on the idea. I decided to die.The hard part was how to die. I didn't want it to be painful.

Lorry - unchecked (no body left if I want to come back on parole),

hanging - unchecked (won't look good when photo comes),

Vein Cutting- No (Out of fashion);

Yes, that's it! I will drown myself. I will be taking a bath and dying at the same time. And drinking water has not been painful so far and thus I will have a great death.

So I decided to die when father was bathing, mom was cleaning the kitchen and ammomma was snoring. And the place where I drown, will be our fish pond. I has fallen into it accidentally three years back and had almost drowned and my Dad had saved me. I was still afraid of the place that I never used to go near it.

The time at last dawned when father was bathing, mom was cleaning the kitchen and amoomma was snoring. I made way quietly outside. I made sure I walked out of the lights so that nobody saw me (thank god for spy movies). I reached the edge of the pond. Only eerie silence accompanied me.

Suddenly a sound came from behind. My heart jumped into my mouth. I was convinced that it was a aathma of some poor chap who had drowned her earlier. I turned back. A big mean frog was sitting there watching me with mean, evil eyes. I took a stone and threw at it with the accuracy of Agarkar's attempt at the wickets. The stone bounced off the ground, leaving the frog unhurt and more importantly he was mad.

The frog jumped towards me and sat on my leg...

'AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH', CROACK.. CROACK... SPLASH... BLUM...

I expected the gloominess to settle soon. That's when I realized I could breathe under water. I opened my eyes and saw that I was standing with the water till my chest. Sure I had grown fast in three years and I had not considered my rate of growth over time. Darn .. I was always bad at maths.

I could see the damn frog swimming to the shore. @##$@#$%$% FROG

I climbed out of the pond and decide to end my expeditions for the night. I limped to the house, as I had hurt my leg on a rock while falling. I entered the nice clean house with white flooring, drenched in water , mud on my feet and lilies on my head.

At first sight Mom got afraid on seeing me and let out a faint scream. After my reassurance she sat down. By the time Dad had come down and Ammomma was standing there in shock.

Dad finally asked me what had happened after a few moments of deadly silence. I opened my mouth to say that I had gone to die, when my super intelligent brain interrupted the conversation considering all the factors and deciding that I would be grounded for life if I said so.

The tongue automatically twisted the other way and said, 'I got afraid when a frog jumped at me and I fell into the pond'. My Face put on the crying, innocent expression.

The expression didn't have any effect on Mom. She pinched me hard on my arm. 'Aaaaaaaaa...', I went on like a broken CD player. The house was filled with my song and Mom had gone all guns blazing as to who told me to go to the pond at this time.

It was good that Dad thought I have had enough for one day and broke the connection between my Moms fingers and my throbbing arm. Mom didn't allow me into the room. I had to take bath in the tap outside the house in the cold, with a twitching arm and an injured leg.

Next morning I woke up with a cold. The good thing was that I didn't have to go to school and I got enough time to think over the dying thing. Dying was never a bright idea, I finally decided. I would never be able to taste these pazhampori's (banana bajji) that Mom makes if I die. I had got my reason. And the confusion over heaven and hell can wait for another 80 years or so. :)

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20 How to wield Success at the GATE

[Image Courtesy: http://www.istockphoto.com]

This post was written by me successfully during the GATE exam 2009.

Three hours of peace from the noisy life of Bangalore, just for a cost of Rs.1000/-.Apply now!!!

Waking up early on a Sunday morning is a bad sign. Waking up on a Sunday morning after a party with friends the previous night to write an exam -- the worst sign. The alarm played the perfect part of the dream destroyer that morning as well. After one hour of relentless ringing I had to give up to the irritating power of Evanescence's wake me up inside ...

I had got ready to leave home but I had one more task to complete before I could be there for the exam. I had to find the way to the exam center. I was able to reach the holy place, a well 1 hour 15 minutes before time, with lot of help from blore's own Auto bhaiyyas. I thought i would be the one to reach there first. But i was greeted by the faces of those guys who were going to have more beautiful wives and cars than me; the guys with the thick glasses and the greasy hair- the geeks. It was like walking into the sets of Attack of the Nerds. Amidst the ruckus created by the geeks and other semi interested students and engineers, I made my way to the small shop on the other side for my breakfast. Finally after a long time of a guy came and commanded the throng of people to go in and be seated inside.

It was a truly nostalgic feeling. Like a blast from the past. Memories of ye old University exams.. Haha.. Many of them were prepared or at least looked like they were. I knew that the only things I was going to answer were the questions on the right side. These questions were like, name, roll number and a number of such tough questions. But they didn't mention anywhere about how much marks each of those questions carried.

Anyway i went about answering all those questions when I saw a guy come in with a big bottle of water. Oh!! man.. prepared like anything. I should have brought pop corn. But I wasn't sure whether eatables were allowed in the exam hall. :( The technical questions were pretty easy. I could answer at least 7 of them correctly. which is a big achievement ( applause). I answered a total of 48/60. I didn't want to get the negative marks of the next 12 questions as well ,so, I stopped guessing the answers. The questions were generally categorized into two : those that I knew and those i didn't. But the latter category contained more questions and I am planning to write to the Chairman about the quantity of questions in Category 2.

In the meantime the guy who had come with the water had almost finished his bottle and from his face I could notice that he seriously needed to take a leak. Poor Guy..

I finished the exam in record time. But the Hall ticket said I could not leave before the completion time. So I cross-checked my brilliant answers and waited for one and a half hours before I asked the invigilator(a typical college lecturer) whether i could gracefully take my leave. I think he was invigilating an exam for the first time and the pride could be seen on his face. With the same gracefulness he told me that I would have to wait till the completion of 3 hours. And to think I never even sat through the whole time of any university exam.. OMG!! I was trapped in some other strange time space continuum.

This was the time, in the course of the whole exam, that I had a major dilemma. What will I do for one more hour? I didn't waste time to find the perfect solution. I found the desk a very good place to get the rest of the Sunday morning sleep. And sleep I did for half an hour. A delightful slumber. I woke up fast in fear, lest I should talk in my sleep and give away those brilliant answers that I had given.

Then I saw the desk. Aha! Nothing more interesting than to read the comments on the, long deprived of paint ,desk. And that too the back bench. :D

The guy who sat at my place was a rap fan (snoop dog and shaggy were the decorators of that place). At one time he had been a Shakira fan but he had developed a certain disliking for her. He name was scratched upon with dividers and correction ink so many times, that I had hard time reading that.

'Does love hurt ?' [some body was planning on loving someone]

The aswers were " Love hurts!!!' [he shouldn't have been so outright]

"I dunno. Please find out" [ i liked this one :)]

Then a series of four letter words.

Another guy had professed his love on the wood :

Mental Chandan*** loves Sharmila... *** [confessions of a self proclaimed crack or the work of his best friends . :)]

The other things were lots of Swastika symbols and random questions and answers.

Soon losing interest in them, I waited for the final fifteen minutes to go by. It was pure torture. I never thought 15 minutes would be so long. And finally the hammer struck the gong and I was free again. I walked out of the college gate passing the excited and nervous faces of the geeks and other unimportant people. That was the only gate i think i could have passed with so much of preparation.

Atlast an end to the trauma of whether I should go for higher studies or not. Then there is always next year... ;)

*** Original names cannot be given out due to security risks to the author. And Chandan; Yes, I took revenge on you for taking my name in vain.

Dad : If you are reading this; This is not my story but of some guy who went to a Gate exam without studying. How can he do that?

Status : Checking my GATE answers... who knows.. may be I got all 48 right. ;) and will be on my way to an IIT before you know it.

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